Today I am going to work on a wig for a girl I went to high school with. She is 36, and suffers from ovarian cancer. She and my mom were diagnosed at the same time 2 1/2 years ago. It is so sad, but she is so strong. She is a beautiful person, always helped others, and I am amazed at her strength.
So what has been going on with me. Well, the trees on my lot are gone. But the jerk who owns the lot next to me is now questioning my property line, this is also the man that he and his wife bombarded me one day when i was at the lot and said they should be building my house, they build all the housing in the community, I should cancel with my contractor, all that bull shit. I let it roll off my back and laughed it off, but he & his wife are vindictive people. He went to the community association saying I was rude and over the line, then he went to the township, then they went to the man who is going to be digging for me. I had given the community permission for him to call me, but instead of facing me and talking he is trying to stall my permits. Funny thing is the TWP. hates him. they called me and said he is an ass. They said I am not required to do anything to make him happy, but because he is a problem causer to everyone all the time I should get another survey done. So I am. They all helped me get a nice company that actually have dealt with this man and they don't like him, so everything will be fine. The thing is I should have listened to my gut and redone the survey. Everyone said not to, but they were just trying to help. Anyway, I am doing it and once it is done he can't say or do shit to me!!! It does show me though how people are. My friend said I should have reported him to the TWP and the community, but I just don't do that kind of stuff, maybe now I need to. I don't have someone to stick up for me, so I have to be my own voice, which I usually have no problem with. I am lucky all the inspectors and those people want to help me, I am thankful for that!! My house is supposed to be delivered by the 17th, just pray I don't have to come up with anymore cash for anything!! I am really tight right now!!!
So on my sobriety, I am still sober, but feeling out of the circle. I think that is the only way to describe it. I feel like I am just not connecting in my area to anyone. I have to try harder, I guess right now I am just pulled in a lot of directions and I just don't know. I know I am an alcoholic. I know I can't drink safely, but I am thinking in my head that I wished I could. I think it is more a wish then a desire. I think because I haven't connected to any AA people here that I feel like I have no sobriety around me. I would love to celebrate my house with a drink, but if I think about it, I would have NO house if I drank. It's crazy thinking, that's why I know I am an alocholic. I have an alergy, a disease. I can't drink, i think I also need to be busy. I have nothing to do!! Work will not be full time until Nov. which is good to paint and stuff at the house, but right now I am in a holding pattern. If I had more money I could be going and seeing people, but right now even gas is a luxury and I need to keep my spending down. I will make it, I will get by, I just need to keep going to AA, reading my blogs, and praying!! Praying is what will keep me sober and get me by!!!
Have a great weekend everyone!!